Knife-Life-Crisis

Dear Friends of the Swiss Army Knife Cult.....

2006-10-31T16:06:00.000+01:00

No knife-cartoons for more than a month. Sorry about that. But: This is not a final cut. It's just temporary.
I'll be back. Don't know exactly when. Have to write a bunch of tv-scripts and stuff to make a living. So, please,
keep in touch and visit this blog every once in a while.
CU
MacKnife

2006-09-27T09:29:00.000+02:00

Shrink in jeopardy.

2006-09-27T09:28:00.000+02:00

God save the Queen.

2006-09-27T09:27:00.000+02:00

Why are french knives so arrogant?

2006-09-27T09:26:00.000+02:00

Warning: to much tv takes your edge off.

2006-09-27T09:24:00.000+02:00

Knives of the Caribbean.

2006-09-03T21:20:00.000+02:00

Two flying Swiss Army Knives cursing a knife-thrower just a second before they hit the target.

2006-09-03T21:15:00.000+02:00

Loudmouthed show-off rapping about his "first time" (which was, to tell you the truth, a devastating disaster).

2006-08-30T10:02:00.000+02:00

Embracing Reality.

2006-08-30T10:00:00.000+02:00

Three rejected knives finding comfort in chanting a Frank-Zappa-Tune.

2006-08-30T09:59:00.000+02:00

Ship of Tools.

2006-08-24T14:23:00.000+02:00

Fleas & Fees

2006-08-17T20:57:00.000+02:00

FAQ: How can I distinguish original Swiss-Army-Knives from fakes?
Answer: The original Knives don't wear hats and sleep like bats.

2006-08-17T20:56:00.000+02:00

Two knives feeling guilty.

2006-08-16T19:48:00.000+02:00

The Swiss-Army-Knife of Sigmund Freud.

2006-08-15T10:01:00.000+02:00

Dear R.E.M.-Addicts: Please don't do that at home, kids.

2006-08-15T09:42:00.000+02:00

Let the good times roll.

2006-08-14T21:28:00.000+02:00

The shrink always knows better.

2006-08-14T21:24:00.000+02:00

An unexpected answer.

No cartoons, but at least a joke.

2006-08-11T19:12:00.000+02:00

McKnife was very busy this week. Had to make some money. Had to rewrite a filmscript (you can't make money by drawing cute pocket-knife-cartoons).

McKnife would be happy if you'd accept a little pocket-knife-joke as an ersatz.

Okay, there it is:

Three pocket-knives meet at an international pocket-knife-convention. One is from France, one is from Switzerland, one is from the US of A.
"I'm so sharp", says the french knife, "that I can cut an oyster into one hundred slices and it will still look absolutely intact and you'll can swallow it in one piece."
"I'm so sharp", says the swiss knife, "when I cut out some pieces of a cheese and push them back into the wholes, the cheese will look absolutely intact."
"I'm so sharp", says the american knife, "that I can cut the brain of George W. Bush into one thousand pieces and if you take an x-ray-picture of his head after that, you'll still see an absolutely intact tiny pea lying in his scull."

2006-08-07T23:03:00.000+02:00

The ugly faces of stupid phrases (1)

2006-08-07T23:02:00.000+02:00

The ugly faces of stupid phrases (2)

2006-08-07T23:00:00.000+02:00

The ugly faces of stupid phrases (3)

2006-08-01T09:48:00.000+02:00

Liberté-Egalité-Fraternité 1

2006-08-01T09:47:00.000+02:00

Liberté-Egalité-Fraternité 2

2006-07-30T20:11:00.000+02:00

10.000 bucks to early.

2006-07-30T20:10:00.000+02:00

Everybody but you.

2006-07-30T20:08:00.000+02:00

Gotcha: Cutwin singing an original Bertold Brecht-tune.

2006-07-30T20:07:00.000+02:00

I like Paris.

2006-07-26T21:54:00.000+02:00

The show-off and the priest,

2006-07-26T21:52:00.000+02:00

Have you seen your mother, baby?

2006-07-24T19:24:00.000+02:00

You boett-ead!

Please notice:
1. The Opinel always knows better.
2. For the Opinel the "u" is an "oe" (like the "i" in firm) . It can't vocalize the "h", so in this case
"boett-ead" means butthead.

2006-07-24T19:21:00.000+02:00

C'est moi gives a foeck.

2006-07-24T12:39:00.000+02:00

World of Rhymes.

2006-07-23T23:30:00.000+02:00

I cut, so I am.

2006-07-23T23:26:00.000+02:00

I'm the thinking man's knife.

MacKnife is back.

2006-07-23T23:02:00.000+02:00

It was a very tough expedition. And I catched one of these Opinels. This guy is something special. He's got only one blade and no other tools on the side. The blade is very sharp, but also his tongue. He understands english very well, but rejects to speak english. You can ask him whatever you want, the answer is always the same (with a thick french accent of course):" I don'ta speake english, you
foecke." I'm trying to tame the beast and teach him some manners. We'll see.

MacKnife has good and bad news for you.

2006-06-23T08:25:00.000+02:00

Bad news first: For the next four weeks MacKnife will be not able to present daily cartoons.

And now the good news:

MacKnife is going to undertake a very dangerous expedition to explore the exotic world of a special tribe of knives: The Opinel.

The Opinels (see picture) live in France, mostly in the Normandy. MacKnife will observe them, hunt them - and catch some of these guys.
If the expedition is successful, MacKnife will present you 20 Swiss-Army-Cartoons (minimum) and some new Opinel-Cartoons too, when he is back home. Till than he invites you to enjoy the cartoons in the archives (more than 200).

2006-06-23T08:19:00.000+02:00

All you need is love.

2006-06-22T10:48:00.000+02:00

The unmasked opinion-thief.

2006-06-21T22:06:00.000+02:00

Truth hurts.

2006-06-21T08:01:00.000+02:00

There's some trouble ahead.

2006-06-20T08:10:00.000+02:00

A knife with strong opinions.

2006-06-19T21:11:00.000+02:00

It's getting better all the time.

2006-06-19T21:10:00.000+02:00

Rick Blaide and a friend at the Casablanca airport, 1942

2006-06-19T21:07:00.000+02:00

Day after day, alone on the hill,
The knife with the foolish grin is keeping perfectly still.

2006-06-16T00:32:00.000+02:00

Hey brother, gimme a rhyme (5)

2006-06-16T00:27:00.000+02:00

Can't even spell headquater right, this ugly peace of you know what.

2006-06-15T20:45:00.000+02:00

The happy wanderer.

2006-06-15T20:41:00.000+02:00

Sad, but true: even the most innocent looking pocket-knives can be perverts.

2006-06-14T12:29:00.000+02:00

Memories are made of this.

2006-06-14T09:47:00.000+02:00

The sympathetic shrink.

2006-06-13T12:39:00.000+02:00

Wrong time, wrong place.

2006-06-13T12:38:00.000+02:00

A very warm welcome in the world of bad taste.

2006-06-13T12:37:00.000+02:00

Hey brother, gimme a rhyme (4)

2006-06-13T12:35:00.000+02:00

Hey brother, gimme a rhyme (3)

2006-06-13T11:37:00.000+02:00

Hey brother, gimme a rhyme (2)

2006-06-13T11:33:00.000+02:00

Hey brother, gimme a rhyme (1)

2006-06-13T11:30:00.000+02:00

Dude, dude, dude.

2006-06-12T22:48:00.000+02:00

It is that simple.

2006-06-12T21:29:00.000+02:00

Colour my world.

2006-06-12T19:07:00.000+02:00

I'm so lonesome I could cry.

2006-06-11T16:33:00.000+02:00

A knife trying to fight against a real mean Minderwertigkeitskomplex (inferiority complex)

2006-06-11T16:30:00.000+02:00

Artsy-Fartsy-Day I: The Highlander is going mad. Really bad, that is.

2006-06-11T16:29:00.000+02:00

Artsy-Fartsy-Day II: Kind of yellow.

2006-06-09T08:45:00.000+02:00

I don't know who I am.

2006-06-08T17:07:00.000+02:00

Nightswimming deserves a quiet night.

2006-06-06T10:28:00.000+02:00

Imagine.

2006-06-06T10:27:00.000+02:00

The shit hit the fan.

2006-06-06T10:20:00.000+02:00

Reckless destruction of a dream.

2006-06-05T13:21:00.000+02:00

Studies in Black (1)
Black Belt & Black Eye.

2006-06-05T13:20:00.000+02:00

Studies in Black (2)
I see a red knife and I want to paint it black.

2006-06-05T13:19:00.000+02:00

Studies in Black (3)
Why do you think you are depressed?

2006-06-01T22:56:00.000+02:00

Global Players.

2006-06-01T22:55:00.000+02:00

California dreaming

2006-06-01T22:49:00.000+02:00

Bridge over troubled water.

2006-06-01T22:45:00.000+02:00

Barfology 101.
The 2 main barfing-types are
a) the dense, hard, spurting one
b) the wide, soft, raining one
Depends on the size of the mouth, the number of drinks and the kind of food.

2006-06-01T22:43:00.000+02:00

Say hello to the halo.

2006-06-01T21:00:00.000+02:00

The power of love.

2006-05-30T23:03:00.000+02:00

What a nice offense (1)

2006-05-30T23:01:00.000+02:00

What a nice offense (2)

2006-05-30T23:00:00.000+02:00

Stronger than love.

2006-05-29T21:46:00.000+02:00

Vertically cruesed, hoffmaned or devitoed.

2006-05-29T21:45:00.000+02:00

The wild one.

2006-05-29T21:44:00.000+02:00

Holy Moly 1.

2006-05-29T21:39:00.000+02:00

Holy Moly 2.

2006-05-29T21:36:00.000+02:00

The largest study of its kind has unexpectedly concluded that smoking marijuana, even regularly and heavily, does not lead to lung cancer. The new findings "were against our expectations," said Donald Tashkin of the University of California at Los Angeles, a pulmonologist who has studied marijuana for 30 years.

"We hypothesized that there would be a positive association between marijuana use and lung cancer, and that the association would be more positive with heavier use," he said. "What we found instead was no association at all, and even a suggestion of some protective effect."

Light'm up.

2006-05-29T20:39:00.000+02:00

I look at the nerds & the geeks & the freaks,
while my guitar gently weeps.

2006-05-29T08:08:00.000+02:00

Absolutely no problem.

2006-05-26T10:48:00.000+02:00

The spilled milk of human kindness. (1)

2006-05-26T10:47:00.000+02:00

The spilled milk of human kindness. (2)

2006-05-26T10:45:00.000+02:00

The Procrastinator.

2006-05-24T09:47:00.000+02:00

What is more exciting than going downhill?

2006-05-24T09:46:00.000+02:00

Bad day in the life of a modest guy.

2006-05-24T09:45:00.000+02:00

Money and taxes.

2006-05-23T09:12:00.000+02:00

Nobody loves me.

2006-05-23T09:11:00.000+02:00

Rules for fools

2006-05-23T09:09:00.000+02:00

I'm not a crybaby.

2006-05-20T14:03:00.000+02:00

Don't shoot the pianist.

2006-05-20T14:02:00.000+02:00

Desperate houseknife.